The babycation is over, Katie has gone back to work. She and Adam have hired a young lady to nanny that seems to be just the ticket: she loves babies and has varied experience in the field yet didn’t price herself right out of the market. Adam and Katie adjusted their own schedules to keep the nanny’s hours reasonable. Adam often works at home, which had to ease Katie’s mind. No matter how credentialed and kind the help may be, it’s natural for a mother to feel like she’s abandoning her kids when she leaves them with a stranger. The good news is, we get over it pretty quickly.
The hard part is what you miss: every smile, every new skill, from flipping over to walking…it sucks to think that someone else is seeing it. It was always a myth to tell women they could have it all at the same time. Life is full of choices and every time you choose one thing, you’re not choosing something else so you have to weigh your options and decide what you want or need most.
I was fortunate in that I found a career (hah!) that I could do at home, set my own hours and take with me when we moved to different states. But I’m not going to lie: it wasn’t easy. It takes a lot of discipline to be your own boss and I’ve never had a lot of that. Back in the days when my kids were little, I made less in a month than I do know in a week and it’s not only because I’ve gotten better at my craft, although that’s a big part. Designs that used to take all day to paint I can now finish in a fraction of the time. Studying watercolor also helped in ways I never imagined.
That’s kind of how most careers are, I think: you grind away for decades and suddenly you’re a success.
I loved raising my kids. I find babies utterly fascinating and toddlers are funny as heck. It was great to have several hours to myself when they started school but when my kids began kindergarten, I had a new baby. Twice. The closest thing to a Mom freak out I ever had was when my baby, Josie, started kindergarten, which just happened to be the same time that my oldest, Tyler, started his senior year of highschool. Time, inexorable and relentless, was marching on much too fast for my liking.
But that was a long time ago. This spring, Josie will graduate with a science degree from a prestigious university and Tyler’s kids are turning 5 and 3.
There are times when I miss the tiny people who used to hang around all day with me, making me laugh. I miss them with an indescribable pain. But I wouldn’t trade the adults they’ve all turned into for the little kids they used to be. I’m very proud of the adults they’ve become and they still make me laugh all day!
And the grandkids were totally worth waiting for!
I’m going to miss seeing Boopity and Boop every day but it’s time for me to get back to my real life. I’ve got orders piled up, plans to make and my kitchen floor to mop.
Hey, it’s not all fun and games.
It’s my own fault for letting Jay choose a white kitchen floor when we remodeled back in ’98. A white kitchen floor? Insanity!
I’m not saying I’d never mop if I had a different floor. I’m saying…who could tell?
I think a hardwood floor with a driftwood finish would look fantastic in my kitchen. In fact, I’d love to install something like that from the back door all the way through the TV room. But those things are pricey and I’ve just taken a three month leave of absence.
I tend to work harder when there’s something I want to buy. My ambition is about equal to my organizational skills. Once I have enough to buy groceries and pay my Netflix account, I’m usually ready to call it a month.
You can call me lazy but I prefer to think that I’m simply content with what I’ve got. After all, my life is more convenient, comfortable and entertaining than that of every king and emperor who lived before WWII.
Being content with what you have is not the key to happiness. There’s more to real happiness than that.
But being discontent when you have enough to eat, a roof over your head and no real fear of being killed in your sleep is definitely a key to unhappiness.
Like so many other things in life, it’s a choice. It’s an easier choice for some than others of course, but a choice nonetheless.
I miss BoopityBoop.