In the old days, I would have grabbed the opportunity offered by all this solitude to write something but it's been so long, I've gotten out of the habit and can't even remember how to do it any more. Life got so jam packed with stuff that something had to give and that's what it was: writing. It's too bad, I really enjoy it. Things have calmed down a bit, after 5 years of nonstop drama. First was Dad breaking his neck, which flipped the entire family on it's head, then of course came the pandemic, which flipped the whole world on its head...
I think some of what got flipped has been irreparably broken but a lot of life is finally back on its feet again. People were always a little crazy; Covid made us all a bit crazier and some people have lost their minds entirely. That's okay, we can all deal with personal crazy, it's the institutional crazy that bothers me. Schools have decided that kids know best, so let them run the places. That's insane but it doesn't look like it's going to end any time soon. Cities have decided that police forces are worse than criminals; that's insane and satanic but so far spiraling crime doesn't seem like enough to prove the powers that be wrong. Here in the Great Stupid (the state formerly known as Minnesota), our medical facilities are finally being allowed to unmask, three years and one month after "two weeks to flatten the curve". Our ass hatted governor has finally let the unscientific, completely stupid mask mandate slip from his clammy, superstitious fingers.
I give the whiff of freedom three months or until someone sneezes before WalzingMatilda tries to reinstate the "emergency".
I've learned a lot over the last several years, the main thing being that I was very wrong about many aspects of human nature. People are far more superstitious and society is far less evolved than I thought. People would rather believe a scary, dramatic lie than the dull, logical truth.
Not me. I like logic. I don't do panic, even when it would be good for me. yeah, I freeze up and my mind goes blank at inopportune times but at heart I'm still the 8 year old who wrecked the horror story at the slumber party.
It went like this: "A man stopped at a bar after work and drank till closing time at 2:00 am. Then he drove home, drunk. In the morning, he found the body of a little boy embedded in his car grill: he'd been so drunk he didn't even know he'd hit the kid!"
And I immediately said "Why was a little boy out wandering around at 2:00 am?"
I didn't get invited to too many slumber parties after that.
Sometimes panic is actually good for you. The first time my tongue swelled up (turns out I have a slight intolerance for aspirin), I freaked out but did get myself to the emergency room before I asphyxiated myself. My allergist told me panic in that situation was good, as it flooded my body with adrenalin, a natural antihistamine. Ever since then, I've been unable to panic when I feel the first tingling of swelling. I try. I just can't pull it off. Fortunately, since I no longer take any products containing aspirin, it hasn't been an issue. Someday, I expect my dead body will be pulled out of somewhere and the experts will all agree; "If she had only had the sense to panic, she may have survived."
Oh well.
April has been truly schizophrenic.
We had 8 heavy, wet inches of snow on the first. By Easter on the 11th, the snow was mostly gone, the sun was out and the ice on the lakes was all breaking up. Then we had three days of temperatures in the high 80s! I walked the lakes in shorts and sandals. Then it snowed again. Two days ago, I was at Zach's place, playing with #6 and had driven through a sleet storm to get there. But even though it was still snowing when I came home, I saw as I crossed the river that the trees on both sides had a film of green over them: leaves are budding! Winter can huff and puff but spring wins.
Business is finally slowing down to pre-pandemic levels. It was nice to be inundated with so much work that I knew I'd be busy for months but it was pressure, too. Now I can relax a little bit and of course, I used that windfall to pay off all my debts. With no monthly nut hanging over my head, it doesn't matter if I hit my self imposed quota every week. I am free to retire if I wanted to but I don't want to. My job is fun!
But I could actually take a little time each week to try writing something...get back into the swing of that. That was fun, too.
Today, I'm going to bake myself a batch of chocolate chip cookies because it's my birthday and cookies are much more delicious than cake.